February 2020-

  I have had endless inspiration through the month of February, however, the main muse that stuck with me was a spoken word album I discovered. “An American Prayer,” is an album from the late, great Jim Morrison, and his band The Doors. I’ve always loved the music he created, so I felt even more connected to him when I was able to hear his voice through another medium. So many issues addressed throughout the posthumous album are relevant today, which is moderately horrifying considering it was released over forty years ago. Overall, this mix of music and powerful poetry is a wealth of writing material. I’ve found so much inspiration for my journals, and everything, within this piece of history, and I will forever be thankful for that.

Reference: An American Prayer album

 

 

“I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.”

                                                                                     -Kurt Cobain

  In my opinion, Kurt Cobain was a philosopher trapped in a depressed, angst ridden, severely sick body. He’s always had a huge impact on me; specifically his lyrics and general words. This quote, to me, is the epitome of truth. Why would I want to be loved for a false part of my personality? Why would I constantly act in a way not true to myself, in order for you to love me? I shouldn’t. And that’s why I love this quote. It propels my overly irritated nature into overdrive and gives my mind constant though. It’s a phrase that tumbles through my mind continuously; like a dryer on a heavy load setting. I used this quote on my “About Me” page, because I feel it truly does reflect my personality. I also feel that it reflects who I want to be in the future. This quote inspires honesty; to yourself, and to others. I can’t wait to integrate this into more of my writing; I truly do hope I find fitting opportunities to do so.

 

March 2020- 

If you’ve paid attention to my blog at all, you’ll know that I love music. Music is my main inspiration for most things in life; it keeps me going when things seem to be spiraling out of control, it makes my anxiety less prevalent, and it even wakes me up in the morning. Which, believe me, is not an easy task. The main song that has inspired me this month is Joy Division’s most popular song: “Love Will Tear Us Apart.”  Although most teenagers who actively try to fit in have one of their t-shirts tucked away into the corner of their dusty closet, many have no idea who they actually are. What a shame! Most of Joy Division’s discography revolves around somber topics, sang with an unusual voice, over unforgettable melodies – exactly my favourite! “Love Will Tear Us Apart” never fails to make me fall in love with it every time I have the opportunity to hear the song. But it also makes me think; the lyrics are a lot to take in, especially when you know about the issues of the lead singer Ian Curtis. This song has inspired me to write many of the sad love poems I do, and I’m sure it will continue to inspire me for the years to come. 

Reference: Ian Curtis

 

My second main inspiration of March has been “The Crow,” by James O’Barr. This somewhat “underground” graphic novel has affected my life, and writing, in many ways. I never thought that a graphic novel could cause me to feel anything really – I’m not usually the biggest fan, but this novel made me incredibly sad and thankful for what I have. The imagery in this is terrifying and heartbreaking, but it perfectly matches the constant depression filled atmosphere it creates. The fact that this written, and drawn, work has been based on the pain of a real life event O’Barr experienced breaks my heart even more. He is Eric – the main character – even though he didn’t have the exact same relationship with his Shelly. Shelly is the muse of the book; the one stripped of life with no chance of return. The ending of this novel brings exactly what we knew would come, even though I for sure didn’t want it. I wanted the story to go on forever, but this book is true to its meaning, and plot propellants – anger, death, sadness, and the want to be with your loved ones again. If this isn’t a wealth of journal prompts, or writing prompts in general, I don’t know what is. I fell in love with Eric, and this story, because of the transparency they show. I don’t know how to do this, but I will try to master this with my characters because I don’t think I’ve ever felt as large of a connection with a character, as I did with Eric.                                     

References: The Crow                                                                                                                

 

 

 April 2020-

In the month of April, and partially through March, I read Death of a Salesman.  It’s one of the best things that I’ve ever read; it broke my heart and taught me lessons that no other book, or play, has. The main character of the book is a tragic hero caught up in illusions and delusions – wanting to reach a future filled with The American Dream. One that he can’t achieve, even though he doesn’t realize it. This is a perfectly crafted play where each word has been examined in order to ensure that it conveys the proper meaning. Regret, lies, illusion, delusion, and mental illness are perfectly weaved into a script following a family struggling within itself. It’s depressing and honest, honest to the point that I felt as though I knew the characters when the play came to a close. This play inspired me to examine the validity of The American Dream, and for that, I am thankful because, it is the one thing we search for constantly, but it is the one thing we will never reach. Unrealistic and harmful is the true definition of the dream that has plagued so many; unattainable too.  And I think that this play is the perfect definition of that.

    Reference: Death of a Salesman           

     I had many inspirations throughout April, however Down In a Hole by Alice In Chains once again struck a chord. I’ve loved this song for a long time, but every time I hear it something different inspires me. It’s depressing and honest. It’s a true reflection of what the lead singer was feeling, and what he was living through. The song is filled with metaphors that cover truth, and a tone that perfectly creates a moody atmosphere. You get chills when you hear the song; it’s almost like you’re there with him while he’s singing it. The emotion that pours through is incredible, and of course, heartbreaking. I love this song with all my heart, and I thank it for all the inspiration it has given me through its wonderful wording and striking quotes.

Down in a hole and I don’t know if I can be saved

See my heart I decorate it like a grave                                             

–Down In a Hole by Alice In Chains

Reference: Dirt by Alice In Chains

May:

May came and went with no shortage of inspirations, however, “The Man Who Sold The World,”  by David Bowie struck a chord in my mind. I’m not quite sure where my fascination comes from; maybe it’s the tone, or the story, or the man behind the music. I really don’t know, but it does inspire me to write. It’s eerie, captivating, and fairly applicable to those that are currently ruling the world. There’s something within the lyrics that makes you feel as if you’re living what he’s saying. You can picture the happenings clearly in your mind, but when it’s over you wonder what happened to the rest of the story. Well, at least I do. 

Oh no, not me
I never lost control
You’re face to face
With the man who sold the world

           –The Man Who Sold the World – David Bowie

References: The Man Who Sold the World Album

I’ve always been a fan of the Foo Fighters, even before I really knew who they were, and got into bands. They’re a unique bunch with a variety of songs – I appreciate that. The specific song that inspired me this month was Best of You. In general, quarantine has been a hard thing to adjust to, and it really can get the best of you. I’ve lacked motivation within these months, but music inspires me. I’m happy that I know of music that is inspiring, and honest because you usually can’t forget those songs. I truly do think that this song helped me write for characters and it also helped me adjust to these weird times and just take everything as it is. Even if I get angry, sad, or frustrated –  there’s nothing I can do about this situation. I just have to do my genuine best throughout it.

                                                                   Reference: Foo Fighters – In Your Honor Album

June:

My first main inspiration for June is a Foo Fighter’s song from the same album mentioned above. As you can probably tell, In Your Honor is one of my favourite albums from the group. The particular track is called “Friend of a Friend,” and it makes me sad – I always think of Kurt Cobain when I hear it. I think that was the honest intention. There are so many amazing lines to write from, and the simplicity of the song is beautiful.  I can imagine everything happening through the lyrics; a story being retold in my head. The emotion that this gives off; seemingly conflicted between sadness and understanding helped me to write both “Hello Seattle, I Miss You,” and “The Eulogy.” It set the mood for a character that I could never figure out, it helped me to find the tone for pieces I never thought I’d complete.

He plays an old guitar
With a coin found by the phone
It was his friend’s guitar
That he played

– Foo Fighters – Friend of a Friend 

My second inspiration of June is Rollerball (1975) the movie. It’s really weird and sometimes a little uncomfortable to watch, nonetheless it’s a fun movie that has some great dystopian ideas to write from.  The reason I ended up watching the film is that my dad remembered it from his childhood. I ended up loving the weirdness of the whole thing – guys on roller skates basically killing each other all in the name of a game that the government created. Weird. But it was influenced by Stanley Kubrick, so I’m not sure what else you should expect.

Reference: Rollerball